Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Drink til I Die a D&D Flash Fiction

As I lie here on the floor I think, “Wait, this isn’t how I die.”

The fire crackles warmly and invitingly as the raucous noise in the common room begins to die down. I begin one of my favorite sets, “The Dwarf Who Never Returned”. My room isn’t free tonight so I use a little of the magic. The crowd begins to sing along and dance. I know I’ll have some good tips tonight.

When I finish my last set a strange old man comes up to me. “Young sir, I enjoyed your songs, but I have no coin,” he says. “I do have something that may interest you, however.”

I look at him quizzically. “What could you possibly have that would interest me old man?” As he starts to walk away, something in his demeanor causes me to follow after him. I follow him out into the night and a strange chill comes over me. “Where are you taking me, old man?” Silence is his only reply.

We walk into the cemetery and I begin to worry. He leads me to a fresh grave and for some reason there is a tankard of ale standing on the dirt. His last words to me before he disappears into a puff of smoke are “It never empties.”

Hours later, I can’t get the cry out of my head. “Drink! Drink! Drink!”

“What is this demon that makes me want to drink?”

I fall down and think, “Wait, this isn’t how I die.”

I was inspired to write this story by this video by the Poxy Boggards. Warning it is not safe for work.


  1. Awesome song. I'd never heard of them before!

  2. You should really check out their I wear no pants video. my favorite part is the pantsless D and D session. I actually know someone with that DM Screen.